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‘Scram Bracelet Diaries’ Category

  1. How I Got Here

    January 26, 2013 by Britton_Riley

    We’ve celebrated my milestone of one year sober but do you really know how I got here?

    It wasn’t my intention for my last drink to be my LAST DRINK….EVER. It just sort of turned out that way, thanks to Scram. I know the Scram Bracelet is not without it’s occasional problems, just like any manmade creation, but I have nothing but praise for the device. (NO one is paying me to say this, so let’s just get that clear) The thought process behind this type of punishment is simply genius in my mind. WHY couldn’t I have come up with this?? Oooohhh yeah, because I was too busy being DRUNK! I miss alcohol very much (if you couldn’t tell by some of my recent posts) but because of Scram and forced sobriety, I was able to identify that alcohol and I are a match made in hell. It’s just not good for me and I was well on my way to ruin. It’s a miracle I never killed anyone on my many drives to the bar after pre-gaming or home from the bar after living it up, or back from the river after “relaxing” with friends, dogs, beer, and Parliament Lights (gotta LOVE that recessed filter, right? By the way, I think now if I were to take a drag off a cigarette, I’d probably puke my guts out!….except if it was accompanied by a few beers of course). The level of thoughtlessness and selfishness is something I never would have fully understood without that 6 months that I was forced to cut off all alcohol contact with alcohol. I mean sure, when I would wake up in the morning to the disaster known as hurricane drunk Britton, I would say to myself “damn, how did I manage to make it home in one piece??” and that would be a chilling feeling. But that chill would fade and the next time I would find myself in the midst of partying like a rockstar, I would not hesitate to get in the car and go where I needed to go. IGNORANT, I know.

    In the days leading up to this forced sobriety, I planned my last few drinking events very carefully. I had my exit strategy down. I knew I would be entering “the Scram zone” on January 24, 2012 (one year ago!!) so I wanted to give my system ample time to “detox” before the big day. My birthday is on the 14th and fell on a Saturday last year so I started my “detox”/ “Scram-prep” after the weekend was over. SO, that is how my official sober date came to be January 16, 2012.

    Category Getting Real With Addiction, Life Post Scram, Life Pre Scram, SCRAM, Scram Bracelet Diaries | Tags: ,,,,,,,,, | 3 Comments

  2. Unsinkable

    December 12, 2012 by Britton_Riley

    We just returned from our first ever cruise! It was interesting. Definitely a new experience. It was my mister’s birthday and that is how he wanted to celebrate.

    There is all kinds of new lingo you need to know on a big ship like that. Words like “embarkation” and “debarkation”, the directional terms were especially fun….did you know it is actually StarBOARD, not StarBIRD?? (um, was I alone in thinking they were saying bird?)  That would be the right side of the vessel…. And have you ever heard of a “muster station”?? I hadn’t heard of that before, but they kept telling us we had to report to our designated muster station to go over what to do in an emergency, Titanic-like situation. We had to do this before we could take off….um, debark?….sail away. Oh whatever.

    My mister had just ordered a bucket of beer out by the pool when it was time to report to our muster station to listen to the instructions. (Muster station, schmuster station….I just kept calling it the poop deck. I like that much better) Oh, and might I just add…..a bucket of beer includes FOUR miller lites all for $25.00. Ouch!

    We gathered up our towels, my mister scooped up his bucket of beer, and we reported to the poop deck. They showed us how to put on one of those orange life preservers, and herded us out to where we would hypothetically load up in the dingy in an emergency. As we were all gathered in very tight quarters, shoulder to shoulder with all these strangers, there stood my mister with his beach towel around his neck, sunglasses on his face, a bucket of beer under one arm, and me under his other one. He stood there so proudly and with the attention of the strangers around us, he announced “I’ve got my beer and my wife. I’m ready!” The crowd roared. He reminded me of Cousin Eddie from The Griswolds’ family! Some gave him high-fives, some wished they’d thought to get a bucket of beer for the safety session.

    The beautiful rainbow we saw as we were "shipping out" of Port Canaveral!

    Of course, adjusting to a vacation on the high seas inspired lots of questions for me…..ALL related to the Titanic. Now mind you, I haven’t seen Titanic since it was first in the movie theater in 1997. Well, being on that cruise ship made me practically obsessed with Titanic. Luckily my mister had more of a “clue” than I did and was able to answer some of my dumb questions. I had to confirm that the Titanic was based upon a true story. (Okay, I know what you’re thinking….duh, blondie!….Sorry. I thought so, but I had to be sure.) Then I wanted to know if those people were on a leisurely, vacation-type of cruise, just like us. I remembered they had vehicles on their ship though. I am pretty sure there were no vehicles on ours. The only reason I recalled the Titanic hauling vehicles is the hot, steamy moment between Kate and Leo in the car. Of course that’s the scene I would remember!

    The questions just kept coming. My poor mister had to answer them all. (As we speak, he is DVR-ing a Titanic documentary for me.) Why did they sink? Did everyone die? Why didn’t they know they were going to crash into an iceberg? This is all very confusing to me.

    That night after dinner, we went to the piano bar on the ship. I requested the song from Titanic. The pianist informed me they kindly ask that he not play that song…..for obvious reasons. Whoopsie! So, we requested Tom Petty’s Last Dance with Mary Jane instead. My mister gets all charged up by the line in the song that says “Indiana boys on an Indiana night”.  He is from Indiana and I suppose it takes him back to the good ol’ days of his adolescence/young adulthood.

    We met some nice people on the cruise. There were 2 ladies who had just undergone acupuncture for smoking cessation. They were literally within 48 hours of their very last cigarette. They were trying to quit something they loved. I could totally identify.

    I really struggled with myself about whether or not I would break down and drink. At the very beginning, I just couldn’t see how I couldn’t see this trip through without drinking.I thought about how much more fun I’d be able to have if only I could drink. Every day they had a drink special. All over the place, there were little men walking around with trays of fruity frozen drinks and shots! OH, just kill me now, I thought! I quickly discovered that these little men would gladly bring me a pretty drink with fun garnishes that did not contain alcohol!

    And they were just as enjoyable!! Maybe more!…..remember the fishing trip in St. Augustine???

    ….. My sweet son Tyler and I feeling green on the high seas….we were both wearing our Mister Yuk faces that day! (Oh, and I was wearing my Scram in that picture, even though you can’t see it.) Once I started to feel the sway on that cruise ship, I was thanking my lucky stars that I hadn’t caved to the fruity cocktails! I would have had my head in a nautical toilet. Now that’s a new experience I’d prefer not to have.

    The teens on the ship and I ordered Shirley Temples at the bars! I overcame my internal struggle and unlike the Titanic, I was unsinkable.

    I am still sober. I made it through an amazing vacation…..a cruise, my first cruise ever. With each life event that I experience sober, it gets a little bit easier. I don’t know that it will ever really be easy, but I am definitely very happy with myself!

    Category Getting Real With Addiction, Life Post Scram, SCRAM, Scram Bracelet Diaries | Tags: ,,,,,, | 3 Comments

  3. Mister Movember

    October 29, 2012 by Britton_Riley

    November is coming…..this week! Can you believe it? It’s hard to believe that October is almost over.

    Have you heard of No Shave November? (Also known as Movember) This is where men sport mustaches during the entire month of November, in an effort to promote prostate cancer awareness and Mens’ health in general.

    Well my mister is, of course, on the bandwagon with this whole Movember thing…..and he has started early.

    Yes, this is my Movember man. This is him at dinner Friday night.

    I adore everything the mustache stands for. I love that he is supporting a cause!

    ……BUT I HATE the mustache. It is so gross and just downright creepy. My dad has always worn a mustache and he looks SO handsome with it. My mister just looks better in his goatee.

    Tyler and I have made child molester comments, I’ve called him Stache, we have told him he looks like Super Troopers or Reno 911. This has done nothing but fuel his fire. He says he looks like a mix between Tom Selleck and Burt Reynolds.

    We live close to an Air Force Base. Today they had an air show that we went to. My mister wished he’d had a pair of aviator sunglasses because he was sure they would have asked him to fly an airplane. He thinks that stache gives him a “Top Gun” look.

    (That’s me and Tyler at the air show!)

    (Those pilots sure put on an amazing show!)

    I can’t wait until Movember is over so I don’t have to endure any more of this mustache madness at my house. I hope all of these men in mustaches really does make people go have their man parts checked out.

    By the way, I forgot to tell you in my last post that while my mouth was watering for that beer yesterday, my mister realized that it was killing me…..that I wanted it soooo bad. He told me that I really didn’t want it and that it tasted like ass. He was really being very supportive. I mean, who wants to consume anything that tastes like ass? He was definitely giving it his best effort to take the appeal off of that beer I was salivating over!

    Category Getting Real With Addiction, Life Post Scram, SCRAM, Scram Bracelet Diaries | Tags: , | 5 Comments

  4. Dancing With My Demons

    October 28, 2012 by Britton_Riley

    Burning Desire

    286 days Sober

    That’s 180 days attributable to Scram, 106 days have been 100% MY OWN will power and inner strength.

    That’s pretty remarkable, if you ask me.

    I thought it would get easier, but to my surprise it continues to get harder.

    Not a day has gone by that I haven’t wanted a drink. Some days it is just a passing thought. Other days, it is a real struggle.

    My “Burning Desire” switch has been flipped all weekend. It is big and bright. That burning desire switch is lit up like Times Square on New Years Eve!

    Now, I have to prepare you for what I’m about to tell you. I don’t want you to think that my mister is being disrespectful or unsupportive because he continues to drink. It is the social gatherings when it bothers me to see everyone drinking together, but if it is just my mister having a drink with dinner, I’m okay. It’s strange how some situations are harder to deal with than others when it comes to drinking. I never wanted my mister to stop drinking because I’m out of the drinking world now. In fact, I often feel like I am drinking vicariously through him. Maybe that’s unhealthy but it’s working for me right now and I’m still sober, so whatever…..

    I watch him put that glass to his lips and imagine I am savoring each sweet sip right along with him. The lovely part about it is I get to enjoy observing the act and imagining that it’s me, while all along staying sober, so when his personality begins to change, mine stays the same and I find myself SO thankful those sips I took were only in my mind. When he starts to talk louder, when he repeats himself, when an insignificant issue or situation suddenly becomes headline news, I think to myself….was I like that??? surely not! But the answer is YES! I WAS! And then I’m really glad I am sober!

    When I smell the aroma of  the beer coming off his breath, I want to grab him and lick his face off!! Luckily it’s not always that way. Sometimes the smell repulses me. Right now it’s been down right mesmerizing.

    Yesterday was College Football Saturday…..a former weekly drinking holiday for me. We were out doing some shopping and decided to stop over at Buffalo Wild Wings to catch the first half of the Tennessee game and grab some lunch. I have been in sobriety breakdown mode and for me, this was like entering into the lions den. I know that if my mister knew how ready to break down I was, he never would have taken me there. Perhaps I was feeling a little masochistic….actually I was just ready to have a big frosty mouth watering BEER!

    As we pulled into the parking lot, I actually rehearsed in my head, how I would order a Bud Ligt Draft. Could I do it? What would my mister say? I could imagine the look on his face of sheer disappointment and confusion……a look of really???? You are REALLY going to do this???? 

    He ordered his beer and I ordered my coke. When they brought his beer, I watched the ice chips that had formed on the inside of the frosty pilsner glass float so beautifully up through the beer from the bottom of the glass and my mouth watered. I wanted to push my mister aside and grab that big glass of amazingness and gulp it down. And then I thought of that feeling of floating I would feel in my head. That moment you first feel the amazing buzz. I thought about it. I tried to reason with myself, what harm would one beer do. Then I thought of the fact that I knew my mister would be drinking, so if I did break down and have a beer, how would we get home???

    That is the only thing that held me back. How would we get home? That is the only reason I didn’t pull the trigger.

    Drinking is not an option for me. Drinking and driving is DEFINITELY not an option for me.

    I am still sober.

    I survived one more day.

    As I sat there contemplating the situation, consumed by temptation, I checked my email…..what can I say, I needed a distraction and the Tennessee football game wasn’t doing the job.

    There was an email in my inbox. It was a comment from a reader. It couldn’t have come at a more appropriate time.

    The comment was written by Corey, thanking me for sharing, that it was nice to know someone else shared in the struggle. Corey, THANK YOU!! The words in that comment helped to solidify and reaffirm my choice to stay sober. It is what I needed. Corey was my little angel of sobriety that I needed to hear from, when I needed it the most.

     

    Category Getting Real With Addiction, Life Post Scram, SCRAM, Scram Bracelet Diaries | Tags: ,,,,,,, | 2 Comments

  5. Pumpkin Carving Traditions

    October 20, 2012 by Britton_Riley

    IMG_2236

    Right now we are headed to my sister in law’s house for her annual Pumpkin Carving Party and I am super excited! My mister is driving. While it is only a 2 hour drive, it can get long so he likes to make it interesting. He beeps the horn and announces to everyone in the car that “Sherman tooted!” Never a dull moment, y’all!

    Last year, we had just gotten home from our honeymoon so we weren’t really in halloween-mode. I made the most amazing pumpkin bars with cream cheese frosting for the Pumpkin Carving Party. We stopped at the grocery store on our way to her house to pick up a pumpkin, a ghost cookie cutter, and a mallet. Since neither of us are that good with a knife and we didn’t really feel like poking all of those tiny little holes into the pumpkin from a pre-fab pattern, we thought our plan to just use a cookie cutter was genius!

    …..and it was. Once I got that pumpkin gutted, we were done in no time flat! (Which left plenty of time for drinking…..a hobby we much preferred over pumpkin carving!)

    ….But that was last year. Post-car crash, pre-scram, pre-sobriety.

    This year, I am hoping for Shirley Temples and LOTS of pumpkin creativity! This year we have our son with us. I haven’t shared this with you yet, but he is SO talented. He has a sketch book that is really impressive! (I think he should follow that passion and incorporate it into a career, but what do I know…..you can’t tell these kids anything – whew, I sounded like a real live parent there, didn’t I!) He has already been googling ideas for his pumpkin! I can’t wait to see what he comes up with and I can’t wait to share it with you! I know it will be a masterpiece and he is SURE to “win” our unofficial “contest”. I think his “prize” will be a tank of gas in his new car.

    My mister and my dad will play golf when we get to Ocala, while Tyler, my mom, and I will find a pumpkin patch to go pick out our perfect, prize winning pumpkins. I haven’t decided if my perfect pumpkin needs to be tall so he can have a long face or if he needs to be perfectly round for a cute little plump face….

    My sister in law spreads plastic out all over the back porch and everyone finds a spot and we all start gutting. While pumpkin guts fly, my mother in law is there with a big garbage bag, catching the guts and cleaning up. (She LOVES to clean! And she’s good at it, too! The boys love to tease her if they find a piece of dust in her house…which is rare. Her house is SPOTLESS! She runs her vacuum EVERY SINGLE DAY! Whew, I know where my mister gets that from.) When she sets the bag down, another family member, Alice, rummages through to salvage all of the pumpkin seeds. Her family LOVES to roast the pumpkin seeds! I have to admit, roasted pumpkin seeds are pretty tasty!

    My Scrammy visited me in my dreams last night. I have that dream from time to time. It is like the dream normal people have where they are naked in public. In my dream, I have an exposed Scram in public which can be equally as traumatic!

    Category Life Post Scram, Life Pre Scram, Phantom Scram, SCRAM, Scram Bracelet Diaries, Scram Dreams | Tags: ,,,,,,, | 4 Comments

  6. Cleanin Out My Closet!

    August 8, 2012 by Britton_Riley

    Remember hearing your parent say “save your pennies”?

    Well, that is a conversation we’ve had in our home recently…..

    and our son has taken us seriously.

    When I passed by his room the other day, I spotted this and got quite a kick out of it! He’s so cute! AND we are trying to get him to save his pennies for a car. So far, it looks like he’s got a LONG way to go…..

    Was your weekend relaxing but productive?

    Mine was!

    I felt it was high time to attack this room….you’ll see why

    Eek! You’d think my closet threw up! I use the guest room as my work closet because whoever designed the closet in our master bedroom must have seriously been drinking moonshine. You just get swallowed up in there and forget trying to find anything in that crazy closet! Anyway, I have developed the bad habit of coming home from work and just throwing my clothes on the bed in the guest room. Hello, LAZY!

    I guess this room has sort of become a catch-all spot. And NO, my mother didn’t raise me to have a catch-all spot, room, or even a junk drawer. “Everything has a place” has always been her motto. Her organizing skills are impressive, but even more impressive is the way she KEEPS things in their place! I can get my stuff in order, but then it ends up in shambles and stays that way for a little while and then I go clean it back up. It’s a vicious cycle with me. I’ve been like that forever!

    Well, I had finally had enough of this messy room!

    Tadaaaa!

    I put the leopard prints with the leopard prints, the polka dots with the polka dots, and the cardigans with the cardigans!

    I went to put the gazillion decorative pillows on the bed for that “finished” look….and guess what….they’re PACKED! Imagine that. So the bed looks less like a work of decorative perfection and more like something you would see in a hotel. Oh well. At least you can FIND the bed now!

    Now I know what you’re thinking….that chair doesn’t go with anything in that bedroom! Well, that’s what you get when you combine 2 households. C’mon yall, we’re newlyweds, NOTHING is “supposed” to match! And it could be worse.

    Whew, that feels much better!

    Between cleaning up this room, making a huge pot of scrumptious healthy chicken tortilla soup *which my boys ate multiple bowls of all in one sitting*, and trimming a dog peeper. I won’t show you a picture of that….let’s just say Fletcher’s peeper hair had become SO long that even his Grandma said something about the beach pictures. If I recall correctly, it was “Britton, Fletcher needs his pee pee trimmed!” Not, “oh what cute pictures of your trip to the beach, it looks like the boys really had a great time!” It was “Fletcher’s peeper is hairy”. Lovely, my mother is a pecker checker.

    I’d say my Sunday was pretty dang productive!

     I gave blood for the very first time today. I did pretty well, too! The “vampires” (American Red Cross peeps) were all really nice to me, especially since I was a newbie. They complimented me on my shoes and my eyelashes. You should have seen how big their eyes got when they saw my big fat juicy veins!

    They were all really awesome! I kept asking where Edward was, but no one really had an answer for me…. until someone announced that he’s at a bar getting drunk because Bella cheated on him!  I guess that’s why it seems we missed each other. Darnit!

    The latest installment in my drinking unpleasantries…..

    The Hangover isn’t just a movie, folks! The splitting headache!!! Spending the entire day in bed, feeling like poop, making promises to yourself, your loved ones, your friends, and praying to GOD that if you just start to feel normal again, you’ll NEVER DRINK AGAIN!!! ….then, the next weekend you drink, spend the next day in bed ALL DAY LONG, beg GOD to make you feel normal again, promise Him that you’ll NEVER DRINK AGAIN if you can just feel normal again! …..until Saturday when the game is on and the beer is flowing, your team wins, and of course you’re going to CELEBRATE! SHOTS FOR EVERYONE!! Oopsie, you know what you’ll be doing the next day? You forgot! You’ll be spending the day in bed. Drinking Pedialyte, Gatorade, Kool Aid, Orange Juice, Water, ANYTHING WET because you are SOOOO thirsty….then you spend the day with your head in the toilet because your tummy is WAY too weak to keep any of that down. And as you kneel before your porcelain throne …which by the way, is where POOP goes and your FACE is currently in that very place…EW! But you could care less at this very moment….you plead with your porcelain throne to help you feel better because you’ll never drink again and praise your porcelain throne for being cold and wet.

    ….you see where I’m going with this? You notice a pattern? How do we forget this misery so easily when it’s time for a celebration or dinner with the girls?

    Well, since the hangover promises never worked, I am trying another approach. Two hundred and something days of sobriety feels SO good, I promise I’LL NEVER DRINK AGAIN!! I’m thinking this approach may just work a little better :)

    Category Life Post Scram, SCRAM, Scram Bracelet Diaries | Tags: , | 3 Comments

  7. The Compromise

    July 28, 2012 by Britton_Riley

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    Find Chad's BBQ Sauce on Facebook here: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Pig-Palace-Barbecue-Sauce/185047224900927

    How was your Fridee?

    Mine was fabulous and very productive!

    My mister is off getting his hair cut. He is very particular and I hope he doesn’t come home with a bad chop job. Our weekend will be shot if he gets a bad haircut. We’ll probably shave his head if they do a bad job. Seriously, he is SO high maintenance! He was the epitome of “metro-sexual” during his life as a bachelor. He was always dressed so stylishly, he always smelled amazing, his face was carefully groomed into his goatee, and every hair atop his head was perfectly placed. He was quite the ladies man…the “man about town”…the heart breaker.

    He is still pretty particular, but not quite as fussy as he was before we were married, thank goodness!

    So, there is this fabulous little soiree that our friend Chad puts on every year in August. It is THE event of the year!!  (and by the way, our friend Chad makes a BBQ sauce that is so good, you’ll wanna slap your sister. He has bottled it and he sells it! SO awesome!)

    <——–That is our sweet Chad, right there standing behind the table! My nephew knows him as The Pig Guy. Too stinkin cute! 

    WELL, it happens that this huge event falls on the very weekend that I come back from LA. My mister and I have been trying to decide what to do about this.

    The other difficult thing about this is that ALL of our friends (and many many others) will be there and it would be a wonderful reunion. BUT….and here’s the HUGE BUT, it is also a big “social event” where there will be tons of drinking. Although I have had almost 200 days of sobriety under my belt, my Scram just came off and I am still very vulnerable. I don’t know when I WON’T be vulnerable, but putting myself into a social situation like this may not be the best idea this soon. I have not said ANY of this part to my mister though. I don’t want to take away his fun with our friends, so I planned to just go with the flow and let him take the lead.

    The only concern that I have voiced to him has been that I will just be coming back from LA, only to turn right around and get into the car and drive 500 miles to Tennessee. That is a LOT of traveling for this girl, yall.

    Today, my mister brought up this trip. I know he really really wants to go……

    But do you want to know what my sweet mister said????

    He said……

    You really don’t need to be in that environment right now. I know you would be fine, but there will be a lot of drinking going on. I am trying to make better choices for us and I don’t think we should be in that type of heavy drinking environment right now. I want to be supportive of you.

    This was completely unsolicited!! I was so proud and my heart turned to mush. What a great husband! 

    We agreed that we would pick a different weekend and go visit our friends very soon. I am totally good with that compromise!

    By the way, he just walked through the door.

    Apparently the hair cut took 10 minutes.

    This can’t be good for someone who typically expects his hair to be washed twice, prefers an ear lobe massage (he was spoiled by his Tennessee hair gal-the fabulous Michelle), and likes for his hair cut to take about an hour.

    …..Oh dear, I’ve already heard him say something about having white walls and needing a face lift. Before you know it, I’ll be married to Bruce Jenner!

    (By the way, Pig Palace Barbecue Sauce is totally on Facebook! Check them out if really tasty BBQ sauce is your thing!)

    The next installment of Unpleasantries of Drinking:

    We talked about beer farties, right?

    Well, perhaps even worse are the beer sharties!

    (I trust that you are familiar with the term shart, so I will spare you the explanation.)

    If I could have all of the underwear I ever had to ditch in a public restroom, I’d have a lot more unders!

    What’s REALLY bad is when you have to do it while on a date. Or out on the town with a date and another couple.

    Whew, glad I don’t do that anymore!

    Okay, that’s all I will say about that unpleasantry. It’s a rather stinky situation.

    Category Life Post Scram, Scram Bracelet Diaries | Tags: ,,,,,,, | 4 Comments

  8. The Empty Nesters

    July 27, 2012 by Britton_Riley

    Well, we are officially (temporary) Empty Nesters.

    It is sad. T (our son) has left to go back to Indiana to visit friends & family and to see a concert. I am going to miss him terribly, but he will be back on Wednesday.

    It is 10:30 pm and he is just getting to Atlanta. He’s got a long trip ahead of him!

    Guess who is going to the beach this weekend……

    Sir Higgins and his brother Fletcher!! Oh, and my mister and I too :)

    The last time Higgins went to the beach, he had to wear SHOES because of all of the sand spurs. He looked pretty cute in them.

    This was Outer Banks, NC. If you are looking for a dog-friendly vacation, I highly suggest the Outer Banks! It was wonderful! Higgins had the vacation of his dreams!

    He chowed down in style….

    AND he even attended Yappy Hour!

    He sipped doggie daquiris and munched on some arf d’oeuvres. It was awesome. He was totally vacationing like a Kardashian! He soaked in the party pool with the other pooches and played on some agility equipment.

    But THIS weekend, we are headed back to Saint Augustine!! I am SO excited! I cannot wait to jump in the waves! We are spending the night there on Saturday night. I found a hotel that accepts pets in their ground floor rooms and the beach is dog friendly, as long as they are on leashes. We are going to have such a blast! My mister even got me a new little traveling speaker system that you plug into your phone or Ipod…and it’s PINK! I have been using it every night while I soak in the bath.

    Speaking of the bath, I’ve gone through an entire bottle of bubble bath already! I know that is extreme, but not only can I NOW take a 2 legged bath, I can use BUBBLES!!! Lots and lots….AND LOTS of bubbles!! That is one of the things I am sure enjoying post-Scram.

    I am headed to Los Angeles in about 2 weeks. It is a business trip, but I am still excited. I can’t imagine if I’d had to go and still had my Scram on. I could have gone, I just would have had to whip out my letter from the Sheriff’s Department that explained the device around my leg that couldn’t be removed. That would have been a little bit awkward, especially since I am traveling with someone from our office.

    Another potentially awkward situation that I just barely dodged is pedicures….All of the ladies in our office received pedicures from the big big kahuna that we work for and they want to all go together to use our gift certificates! Fun, huh! Well, that could have been BAAAADDD!!! Could have been, but luckily I’m out of the woods!  Wahoooo! I miss you Scrammy, but I’m glad I can fully function as a normal person again :)

    It is still strange. I still “feel” my Scram, which is SO strange! I wonder when that will go away. I am still really really self conscious of my exposed leg at first when people see me. It is REALLY strange. I wonder when that will go away too….boy, life sure changes when you have something to “hide”.

    So here’s my latest installment of my drinking unpleasantries……I haven’t hear any of YOUR stories yet…what, to you, is one of the worst things about drinking?

    Beer farties!

    Beer farties are a really unpleasant side effect of drinking. If your sphincter is strong enough to keep them in, then your tummy just rumbles and rumbles.  If aren’t so fortunate to have tight muscles down there, then hopefully you are somewhere very loud or at least have very understanding friends. I once lost control. I was standing in a group of men and brrrt…. you guessed it, one accidentally slipped out. I thought I would die when one of them said “WOAAHHH! did you just fart??” Of course they couldn’t be quiet about that. They just about shouted it! I couldn’t help it….. it slipped out, even as hard as I tried to keep it in. I was at a friend’s vacation home in the mountains of North Carolina and I drank Red Stripe the entire way there. I had to quit drinking Red Stripe. I think it is the worst beer when it comes to beer farties.

      <——–THIS disheveled mess is Miss Stinky Pants, myself and it is shortly before I passed out in the corner after the public poot. (No one is too cute to poot. Everyone does it. It’s just that some can control it better than others and alcohol makes your sphincter weak, apparently.) Lovely, I know.  Miss Stinky Pants couldn’t wait until everyone was gathered together. She started drinking long before that and then passed out in the corner while everyone reunited and enjoyed visiting with one another…..Story of my drinking life! I always missed out on stuff because I would get SO carried away “pre-gaming”, that by the time I got to the actual event, I was typically a hot mess. Hence my appreciation of Scrammy for GETTING me sober and for stories like these, among other things, are going to KEEP me sober!

    Category Life Post Scram, Phantom Scram, Scram Bracelet Diaries | Tags: ,,,,,,,,, | No Comments

  9. Release Day Eve

    July 25, 2012 by Britton_Riley

    Sir Higgins has been busy playing with his new frisbee :) and I FINALLY caught him in the act for you to see!

    With less than 12 hours from my Scram – freedom, I  packed up my Scram modem. As we speak, it is on it’s way to my Gabriele.

     

     

     

    My dear friend Tracey asked me yesterday if I was okay. She said she sensed a lot of apprehension, fear, and worry in my recent posts. That was so sweet of her! I am alright, it is just bittersweet. This device has given me a new life. I have had a six month endearing relationship with this little dude. Scrammy has developed a personality and an identity all it’s own and now it is time to say goodbye. (Remember, we’re the family who feels the need to name their cars….everything must have an identity!)

    I have cleaned our bathrooms with rubber gloves for the final time.

    I have itched and scratched my last Scram itch and Scram scratch!

    Last night as I settled in to my bed, my Scram positioned just right so that I could get comfortable. My mother in law fears that I may have trouble sleeping without my Scram vibrating every 30 minutes. I have to admit, I have grown kind of fond of my routine little “massage”, but I am pretty sure I’ll be sleeping just fine when it is no longer there.

    I have received so many well wishes and messages of love and support. They all mean so much, but perhaps my favorite is the letter I received from my dad on the eve of my big day. I would like to share it with you…..

    Dearest Britton:

    In the morning, your ordeal with SCRAM, that you have handled beautifully, ends.  I just wanted to tell you how proud Mom and I are of your understanding and acceptance of the entire situation, all the ramifications; past and future, and the strength of commitment you have made to make others aware of the stupidity of alcohol use; most importantly, your resolve to not succumb to alcoholic drink temptation.
    When the urge surfaces with your leg free of SCRAMMY, just dig down and remember all you have learned and the many members of your “wolf pack” that support you.  Mom and I are your best and biggest supporters, as you know.  In those instances of temptation, think of your “alcohol-free” life as a lifestyle change that is healthier, less expensive, and non-inhibiting to good judgment and decisions.  I promise your life will be infinitely happier and fulfilling; read and follow the wording you chose for your necklace as many times a day as necessary for “magical” support.
    Whatever has happened in your life that you are less than pleased with, just know that it is not how many times you are knocked down that counts, but how many times you get back up to face life’s challenges.  No matter what, you have Mom’s and my unconditional love and support.  We will always be grateful that Heavenly Father blessed us with the you and the gift of parenting and supporting you.
    I could not be more proud of your work and the career opportunities you have and will create for yourself.  Alcohol will surely compromise a career, as you know.
    Call me and Mom in the morning when you are SCRAMMY free and enjoy your first bath tomorrow night – luxuriate in the warm water with both legs submerged.
    I love you,
    Dad
    …..I am a VERY lucky girl.
    I love you Dad!

    Category SCRAM, Scram Bracelet Diaries | Tags: ,,,,,,,,, | 2 Comments

  10. Manic Mondays

    July 23, 2012 by Britton_Riley

    Ever wonder why Mondays are so dang difficult?

    It is just a day, like the other 4 work days, but for some reason Mondays are extra challenging. I tend to have lots of “blonde moments” on Mondays. I only had 2 days off, it’s not like I’ve been gone a week. It shouldn’t take THAT much to get back into the swing of things.

    I’ll try not to be a hot mess today.

    I told you about my online AA meetings, right? Well, the website that hosts them is called In The Rooms. I was so inspired by the “daily meditation” message that they had for today that I really wanted to share it with you. Pretty appropriate for a Monday, in my opinion. A great message to begin the week… Enjoy!

    Working With Love

    What I do today, I will do with love in my heart. The love that I bring to the various tasks and encounters of my day weave that energy into the very fabric of my world. This world is sewn invisibly together with waves and particles. The waves and particles emanating from me move in and out of a similar field of those surrounding another person. The energy I send is felt by another person on a deeper level than anything I might say. It doesn’t work to be polite with my words but then to feel hate – people get a double message. Double messages make people feel crazy and teach those close to me to doubt their own insides.

    I will work with love.

    And what is it to work with love? It is to weave the cloth with threads drawn from your heart, even as if your beloved were to wear that cloth. It is to build a house with affection, even as if your beloved were to dwell in that house…..It is to charge all things you fashion with a breath of your own spirit.

    - Khalil Gibran

    25 hours from now, my Scram Bracelet will be removed.

    I will be held accountable to make the right decisions for myself and my family, as it relates to my sobriety.

     Um,  no pressure or anything.

    My sobriety will be 100% dependent upon MY choices. The true test is upon me.

    I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will NOT fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon. I will not fall off the wagon.

    Category Getting Real With Addiction, SCRAM, Scram Bracelet Diaries | Tags: ,,,,,,,,,,, | 3 Comments

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