The Scram Bracelet Diaries

A Stressed Out Ms. B

Britton_Riley — Fri, 17 May 2013 04:04:51 +0000

“In times of great stress or adversity, it’s always best to keep busy, to plow your anger and your energy into something positive.”

- Lee Iacocca

Remember this guy? I think he looked stressed…..and I’m pretty sure he has to pee. Looking at this picture always takes my stress away because it makes me laugh! Poor guy, what a hot mess!

What is your favorite way to deal with stress?

Sometimes I like to take a bath (with BOTH feet since being Scram-free!).Most of the time I like to cook, especially when it involves chopping veggies…I LOVE to chop!….it relaxes me and I know I can’t drink and chop. Remember what happened the last time I attempted that? I chopped the top of my thumb clean off!

…..sorry about that, I hope it didn’t make you queasy!

Sometimes I just like to go to bed to escape my issues. I used to like to go to the movies when dealing with stressful situations because it was like I was escaping my reality, but I haven’t done that in a while. This town that I live in has a crappy movie theater. I’m pretty particular about my movie theaters. Strange? Maybe.

Exercise is always a good way to deal with stress too but I haven’t been doing much of that lately either. You know what I’ve found? Like a lot of others, I’ve typically dealt with stress through a nice cold adult bevy. I still consider that as a possible option when I feel stressed, but when I push through and do something other than drink to deal with whatever is troubling me, I find that it is way more gratifying.

Monday night I was a particularly stressed out Ms. B…..

(formerly Miss B until I got married. Mrs. B just doesn’t sound quite right so we’ll just go with Ms. B! Oh and I think when our grandson is born in July, I’ll become Grammie B….what do you think? )

…..SO I made a pot of soup which I knew would involve PLENTY of chopping! Right now it is just me, Higgins, and Fletcher, so I was just going to make a small pot of soup. Well, I started chopping veggies and chopping and chopping and the pot of soup just kept growing and growing! It ended up to be a huge stock pot full of yummy minestrone soup! I took a large container of it to work to share with my work peeps since it was way more than I would be able to eat. Everyone had a bowl for lunch and I’m pretty sure we all now have gas. There were a lot of beans and cabbage in that soup and it was delicious!

That makes me think of a line from the Golden Girls (c’mon, by now y’all know practically everything reminds me of the Golden Girls!)…..Sophia (the little older lady who is super funny) says: “Cabbage she serves me, in ten minutes I could be sky writing!” Oh, I just love that show!

I honestly think gas may be a stress reliever too! Right? Sir Higgins didn’t eat any soup, but somehow he ended up to be very gassy…and he looks pretty stress-free to me!

With my mister in Tampa (3 hours away), I have to do things I don’t normally do……like run the lawn mower. Oh dear….wait, actually I mean OH DEERE, as in John Deere, that was an interesting experience. Luckily it’s pretty simple to operate and hopefully no one had a video camera on me.…. you know how I like to take pictures of unsuspecting strangers….well I have a feeling payback will probably be coming one day!

The mower has a key that you turn, rather than having to use the pulley thing. It is just like you would do on your car.It was easy to start up and it’s not so hard to push either, since it is self-propelled. The only thing is I was all over the place! I swear it was practically dragging me across the yard! (You know their slogan, something about running like a deere….well I suppose they are serious about that!)

I tried to make those nice neat little lines, but I think I’m too ADD for that. I spotted a patch of grass in the middle of the yard that was particularly long and I would go over and run the mower over it. Then I’d go back to my lines. Then I’d spot another patch of longer grass and run over and run my mower over it, then back again t my lines. Then I’d get tired of those lines and make new lines someplace else. And did you know lawn mowers don’t really drive around curves very well? Oh, and they blow your mulch everywhere too. It was a real mess! It didn’t look too bad. It was definitely not a stress relieving activity, that’s for sure!

After I was done, I tried to start up the weed eater. Luckily I couldn’t figure out how to work it because I’m sure I’d have ended up missing a few toes.

Perhaps I should hire a lawn boy.

Puppy Love

Britton_Riley — Fri, 17 May 2013 02:49:36 +0000

It’s almost the weekend and I can’t wait! I get to see my mister again and we have BIG plans. We are going to Orlando Saturday afternoon! We have reservations at a resort that looks to be very nice!

Since I’m home alone….Ahhhhh!

I get all the extra special greetings from the pups. They get so excited when I come home. Tonight I came home 3 hours later than normal because I had to have my hair did. I mean really, did you think the blonde hair was really my natural color?

I love coming home after being at the salon because I love all the puppy nuzzles I get. My hair smells so good, the boys bury their noses into my hair, sniffing and sniffing and it tickles! They went crazy tonight. They were running and jumping and barking. It was awesome! Fletcher jumps so high, we call him “Kangaroo Boy”. Higgins stayed right by my side as I was standing in the closet changing clothes while Fletcher was lurking around the corner, barking for us to come get him. I told Higgins “let’s go get him” and all craziness broke loose! I chased them around on the floor for a while, they loved it!! Talk about getting your natural happy neurotransmitters (serotonin) flowing! Who needs a drink when you’ve got sweet loving dogs around!

Once all the initial excitement was over and I took my makeup off and changed my clothes, we all got into bed. They both were all over me, almost like they wanted to get in my skin. Sir Higgins planted himself right next to me and MADE me pet him. He bats my face if I don’t. Then, if I pet him and stop, he starts smacking me in the face some more until I resume petting him. He’s so bossy!

Here he is starting to bat his paw at me….

Fletcher plastered himself to the other side of me, but before I could get a picture I sneezed and he ran off. Sneezes don’t bother Sir Higgins, but Fletcher gets downright offended if you sneeze. He jumps up, gives you the famous schnauzer stink eye, and leaves. I try to apologize to him and ask him to stay, but he usually leaves anyway.

So, Sir Higgins and I continued on with our sweet, although sometimes violent snuggle session….

Beach Time and Big Hoss

Britton_Riley — Wed, 15 May 2013 01:11:39 +0000

I’ve really missed sharing my stories with you. The last few months have been tough and I’ve reached my breaking point several times. I am sure I’ll talk more about that in a later post, but for now I’d rather tell you about the fun stuff.

I left work Friday at 2:00 and headed south to spend the weekend with my family and my mister. He works a lot of Saturdays and this weekend was one of those working Saturdays so I spent a lot of time with my mother in law. As you may remember, in the wake of the death of my beloved Penelope, we bought Gizmo.

Gizmo is our little Civic who now has over 233,000 miles on him. He is old, but he is ours and I really love that little car. His air conditioner was broken when the dogs and I made the trip on Friday, but it is fixed now. The radio works a little, but the volume doesn’t go up very high. There is no satellite radio, heck satellite radio didn’t even exist 18 years ago when Gizmo was made. There is no CD player, only a cassette player but sadly I haven’t owned a cassette in years! Driving down I-75 with the windows open, you can’t hear the radio. It was a humbling experience and gave me lots of time to soak in how my life has changed since my bad choice. It also made me realize how high maintenance Sir Higgins and Fletcher are.

The trip was rough on them…..

I fed them ice while we drove and I stopped once to give them water.

It was clear they wondered where the heck the AC was!

There is ONE major thing about my mother in law that you’ve got to know…..

She has no interest in cooking. She just doesn’t do it. That’s why she has this hanging on the wall in her kitchen….just so everyone will know she just doesn’t cook!

But guess what! She loves me so much and was so excited for me to come visit that she actually made a pie! It was pre-made crust (that’s totally acceptable in this case!) and she actually made the filling! It didn’t come from a can! She sliced apples! Boy was she relieved that the grocery store had signs above the apples that told you which ones to use for baking

Apparently the signs directed her to use Fuji apples

She didn’t follow a recipe, she just did her own thing, which is totally impressive to me! She sliced the apples, dumped some sugar and butter……can you think of anything she forgot to put in??? Cinnamon!….oopsie! That’s okay though, it was such a sweet thing to do and the pie was tasty…and it doesn’t look like a hot mess, it actually looks like a real apple pie!

My mother in law and I spent the day on the beach Saturday while my mister worked.

Try to ignore all that sun damage on my face…..yuk!

We laid on the beach together for a few hours and she told me lots and lots of stories about her own mother and what it was like for her when she was growing up. (Her mother was very mean to her, so a lot of her stories were really sad.)

Learning more about her was a great way to spend pre-Mother’s Day.

This is the beach we were on. Isn’t it pretty?!

That night, we all went to the local race track to watch my brother in law race his cute little car. (I mean that in the most masculine, manly way possible!)

See him in there with his helmet on? He looks so official!

The only race tracks I’ve ever been to have been Nascar tracks… the Bristol track and the Daytona track, so I was only a little prepared for this experience. I am all about fitting in and I just love a good theme, so I was tempted to do my hair in a makeshift mullet, wear some camo, and accidentally-on-purpose ‘forget’ to wear a bra….but I held back. I wore white shorts. My mister and brother in law both took one look at me and asked what in the world I was thinking…..I was there to watch, I didn’t think I might get dirty!

If you are anything like me, you don’t know “the drill” at the local track, so let me explain. First all the cars go around the track in a preliminary type of race. I’m not really sure what is the point of this preliminary “heat” since my BIL popped a tire after only going around the circle a few times and then still got to drive in the main race when it was time.

Here he is fixing that tire, you know….man stuff!

I didn’t think this was such a stressful event, but apparently I was wrong. People really stress about this preliminary “heat” race. There was pacing going on….by the way, this is NOT my sister in law AND this lady’s hair matched her top. You can’t tell by the picture, but trust me, the color match was remarkable!

See the crash that just happened on the track?

and there was lots and lots and LOTS of sweating going on too…..

I wasn’t pacing OR sweating….am I not a good race fan?? I mean, that’s a LOT of sweat, y’all! This guy was clearly SUPER stressed about this race. We even got to see two guys in the stands nearly get into a fight! I kept hollering (see, trying to fit in by using appropriate lingo) for security, but they never came and luckily the argument didn’t lead to fists.

My brother in law may not have won his race, but he had the best looking car that’s for sure! It was definitely a fun family event! Maybe it would have helped if I had been pacing and sweating profusely??

The next day, my mister was off work and we went back to the beach. (All this beach time…..I’m REALLY going to love living in Tampa!) I was ecstatic to get to spend the day with him!! We loaded up Big Hoss (our jet ski) and headed to the boat ramp on Sunset Island for our day on the water.

In order to get to the boat ramp, we drove through this town called Tarpon Springs. It was a quaint little town and appeared to have a very large Greek population. At first when I saw a restaurant called Mr. Souvlaki, then another called Mama’s Greek Cuisine within 1/4 of a mile of each other, I thought maybe there was a Greek family in the community who just really liked to cook. Then I noticed Greek flags hanging from someone’s porch and several more businesses with Greek names, but what really gave it away was the big Greek Orthodox church. When I saw the church, that’s when I knew it had to be a Greek community. Who knew!

Of course I had to research this. I mean, what on earth would draw all these Greeks to this little tiny town in Florida. How did they even know this town was there? Then I found my answer….SPONGES! Greek divers came over in the early 19th century to harvest sponges. At that time, the sponge business was booming. So I guess I learned two things that I didn’t know…..how the Greeks came to Tarpon Springs and that Greeks are good divers.

I wish I’d known that’s what “the sponge docks” was, I definitely would have stopped in for some sponges!

Once we got Big Hoss unloaded into the water, off we went to do some exploring.

We found an island where everyone goes on the weekend to hang out. It was beautiful! From the island, we could see Clearwater. It would have been so easy just to dash right on over! Did I mention I’m really going to LOVE living in Tampa???

When we arrived at the island, we realized we didn’t have any way to anchor Big Hoss so we could go play. Since we had just been immersed in ultimate redneck culture the night before, we were all about getting creative…and we found this….

A wooden post! Where the heck did THAT come from??? Who knows, but it made a good redneck anchor! We just tied a rope to Big Hoss on one end, the other to the big old post and voila, we had an anchor!

Big Hoss seems to be a suitable name, don’t you think? My friend Terri and her family came up with that name because he used to be theirs. When the Air Force moved them to Germany, Big Hoss had to stay behind so we decided to buy him! I am so glad we did! Terri’s two adorable sons love to see pictures of their old buddy Big Hoss, so I try to take pictures any time we take him out to stretch his legs

After we’d had enough of the sun and we were ready for lunch, we loaded up Big Hoss and headed out of the park. One of my very favorite pastimes is people-watching and boy did I get an eye full! I swear I tried to get a picture for you, but couldn’t……try to get a mental picture….as we made our way out of the park, past the beachside picnic area, I saw a man in a speedo grilling weenies! I sure hope he didn’t grill ALL his weenies!

Hello? Is this thing on??

Britton_Riley — Mon, 13 May 2013 11:00:17 +0000

Hello? Is this thing on??

I have neglected you and I’m sorry!

So many new developments in our lives and I can’t wait to update you…. but not all at once. I’d prefer to keep you in suspense

Summer is here and we’ve been spending a lot of time in Florida these days. In fact, we are MOVING to Florida! Crazy, right? I know what you’re thinking…”Didn’t y’all (if you’re southern or “you guys” if you’re from the Midwest) just BUY a house? Yes, yes we did, but it turns out God had different plans for us. My mister was offered a position in the Tampa area so we’re moving! Unfortunately I have to part with “Massengill Manor” and my super fabulous job. We name our cars and our jet ski, so it only makes sense that our house would have a name too! And yes, that’s Massengill, as in the douche…also as in the store where I found my wedding dress.

Right now my mister is working & living in Florida and I am still in our house in Georgia, waiting for it to sell. Yup, Massengill Manor has been on the market since mid March. My mister started his job the last week of March, so I’ve been all by myself with the dogs. I haven’t really started looking for a new job in Florida yet because I’m really just waiting for MM to sell first. We see each other on weekends and sometimes during the week. It really stinks and I swear the process is more grueling than when we bought it. I hope this long distance/separation thing doesn’t last too much longer. We had a showing MM tomorrow, so fingers crossed they are our buyers! What a wonderful Grand-Mothers Day gift that would be for me!

Oopsie, I said I wasn’t going to update you all at once and I just let that one ‘slip’ out…. Well, it’s out now so WE’RE EXPECTING!!! (A grandson) He will be here this summer! Our son Tyler will be a daddy! Here’s the mothers day card they sent me…..

It came in the form of a fax, which was so sweet and super creative! They didn’t want it to be late, so they sent it via fax! I just love stuff like that

I hope that all of you mothers, mothers to be, grandmothers, grandmothers to be, dog moms, horse moms, and any ole mom had a great Mothers Day yesterday!

I heard this song as I was driving back from Tampa yesterday and thought it was a great Mothers Day song! Enjoy…. (If you can’t see anything, go here)

Brought to Justice

Britton_Riley — Sun, 17 Feb 2013 23:58:24 +0000

Remember when I went to L.A.?

Well, after I spent a little time with Marilyn, I got to see where Lindsay Lohan was “brought to justice”…..just like me!

Here’s where I was “brought to justice”(aka had my Scram put on)…..in case you need a refresher

Here is where Lindsay was brought to justice…..

I think my southern place of justice is way prettier, don’t you?

On the Hollywood tour, the narrator had an adorable English accent. Our tour took us to Beverly Hills.

We passed the Beverly Hilton, where Whitney Houston was found dead in room 434. (They say they won’t be renting that room out to anyone for the foreseeable future…..eerie!)

Eventually we passed the Beverly Hills Municipal Court and he announced we were passing the very location where Lindsay Lohan was “brought to justice”. I loved it! I could totally relate!

The only difference was no one was there to take my picture as I hiked those stairs on my way to my moment of truth like they did for her. I guess I kept such a low profile, that the paparazzi didn’t find out it was my day in court. Whew, I really flew under the radar!

I was able to find Lady Lohan’s mug shot on the internet, but I’ve never even seen my own. I googled myself, I’ve searched high and low, but again….flying under the radar. I’m thinking maybe it was because I was never actually arrested so maybe they didn’t publish my picture for all to see.

I never had to ride in one of these…..

But I’m almost positive Miss Lindsay had to ride in this on the night of her little mishap…..

I snapped this one as I was walking by….just like the Paparazzi!!

They took my mug when I went to be booked and processed that Monday morning. Remember, my accident – CRASH – happened on a Wednesday night/Thursday morning.

I have to correct myself. I hate calling it an accident because of the circumstances.

Back Off, Hallmark!

Britton_Riley — Fri, 15 Feb 2013 03:31:15 +0000

My mister gave me some Valentine’s balloons!

That was kind of a joke. As you can see, we are in a Mexican restaurant here and EVERY table has these balloons on it! They weren’t just special for me from my mister. Actually, they were just the table decorations.

I think Valentine’s Day is dumb, a way for Hallmark to make tons of dough. Yup, I tend to be the St. Valentine’s Day Scrooge.

BUT, I do love to plan parties and I do love the Golden Girls! (You will find out how these two relate…just keep reading!)

The year before we got married, my mister & I and 2 other couples went on a dinner cruise on the Tennessee River for VDay.

It was really fun and the food was decent!

I had everyone over to my condo before the dinner for snacks and champagne.

(I dipped the strawberries myself!)

Kind of nice, huh? Everyone seemed to really like it.

Don’t we look festive?

That was definitely a good Valentine’s Day.

This year, now that we’re an old married couple, we went to a Mexican restaurant for lunch (resulting in gas later….perhaps not the best choice for lunch on the day of love, but whatever) and “celebrated” with borrowed balloons….aka table decorations. For dinner I baked sweet potatoes and my mister informed me that they “are gross” so I shared his potato with the pups. After my romantic dinner, I soaked in the tub while watching The Golden Girls.

Have you seen the Valentine’s Day episode of the Golden Girls? I LOVE IT!!

Here’s a sample…..

My mister did give me a sweet card and he got me a FABULOUS new Michael Kors bag this weekend when we were in Jacksonville!

I guess this sober, whole old married couple VDAY stuff wasn’t THAT bad.

A Super Duper Super Bowl!

Britton_Riley — Tue, 12 Feb 2013 00:19:15 +0000

Stacy has come and gone and I must say, we had a great visit! It was so nice to see my very best friend in the whole wide world…aside from my mom of course.

Doesn’t she look sporty!

Luckily Stacy was never a big drinker….which is one reason she wasn’t in the car with me when I crashed….actually, if she’d had anything to do with the situation that night, I would never have been in the car that night….BUT that means I’d probably still be drinking today and I probably would have crashed eventually anyway…..

…..but I digress, SO having her here for a visit wasn’t really a trigger for me to want to drink. As a matter of fact I have only seen her drunk a hand full of times, most of which were when we first met. She was WAY younger then and trying to impress a boy. Needless to say, we have both become older and much wiser since those days.

Here we are at our Super Bowl Party!

The super bowl party was a lot of work, but I enjoy that type of “work”. It was fun and I think those who came enjoyed themselves. Half of those I invited didn’t come….I guess that’s what happens when you have a party on a Sunday. I really think they ought to change the Super Bowl to a Saturday. Boy was I bushed on Monday! You’d think I’d gotten drunk!

My mister and I were the host and hostess, so we felt it would be most appropriate to be the “referees”! Stacy pulled for the 49ers, but had to do some research on exactly who #52 is since she borrowed the jersey.

I started the chilis early that Super Bowl Sunday morning and let them cook ALL DAY LONG! A wise lady named Margaret taught me to let things like this cook all day on low heat….and she was right! YUM! She always cooked her taco meat and her homemade spaghetti sauce that way and oh my gosh, both were amazing! She sure knew what she was doing in the kitchen!

As a matter of fact, Margaret was the first person I called the morning after my crash. I needed guidance and I KNEW she was the one to call. She was very very special to me. The first words out of her mouth after I told her I’d crashed Penelope and that I was drunk when I did it was a very firm “Call Don Bosch” (that was my amazing attorney). I knew that if that was her advice, I needed to take it. Not to mention, she works for a Knoxville law firm, so she’s definitely “in the know” when it comes to this sort of stuff. Like I said, she is a very wise lady and I have always respected every word out of her mouth. She was like a mom to me.

So, back to my chilis….I tend to get off the subject, can you tell? I’ll try to stay focused.

OH, and don’t worry, I made sure to wipe down my stove top before my guests came. Sorry for the dirty picture

I made Creamy White Chicken Chili and traditional Chili (I used the Wendy’s recipe and one person said “that’s the best chili I’ve ever had!….SCORE!)

I had already had tons of the traditional chili, since I’d just made it 2 weeks before the party (that’s when I got my inspiration to have a Super Bowl Chili Bar), but I’d never made the white chicken chili before and I’d been told it was a great recipe.

Needless to say, I’m sold. The white chicken chili was amazing! I made homemade southern corn bread ….is there any other kind? …..I tore up the corn bread into bits and put it in my chili. I had TWO bowls! It was THAT good!

(yes, you read that right…I said “tore up”…..normally that little expression is used like this…my car tore up….gotta love the south!)

Of course I’ll share the recipe with you….

1 pound of cooked chicken (diced or shredded)
1 onion, diced
1 garlic minced
2- 15oz. great northern beans, drained
1-14oz chicken broth
2 cans (40z.) chopped green chilis
salt to taste
1 teaspoon cumin
1 teaspoon oregano
1/4 teaspooon red pepper
Combine all and cook for about 30 minutes
Remove from heat and add 1/2 cup whipping cream
1 cup of sour cream

I guarantee you’ll love it!! I boiled 2 lbs of skinless boneless chicken breasts the night before (I doubled the recipe….my mom always says you HAVE to make sure you have plenty of food for your guests. She kept telling me how embarrassing it would be to run out of food mid-party.) I chopped the chicken pretty fine right before I was ready to put it in the pot.

Once assembled, I transferred my chilis to crock pots. If you know anything about me and my party throwing, you know I couldn’t just set out ugly old crock pots….I wrapped them in burlap!

See, it’s all about presentation! Doesn’t that look better than seeing a crock pot? I think so!

Stacy “built” my new tiered serving stand. We decided she may just have a future at NASA.

She sure has become very handy in the kitchen! I think it was all the cooking lessons I gave her when I lived in Knoxville. (Those were some great times.)

OR it could also be the cookbook scrap book Stacy-Style that I made for her……

Yup, her handiness in the kitchen HAS to be the cookbook!

Here is the full Chili Bar spread……

See all of the toppings on our “Chili bar”? Cool, huh! We had hot dogs so you could make chili dogs, Fritos so you could make your own little Petro, and baked potatoes to top with chili and all the fixins. It was a foodie’s dream come true! Those colored things in the jar next to the oyster crackers kind of look like gummy worms, but they aren’t. They are chopped red, orange, and yellow bell peppers.

Here we are, hard at work. Aren’t we cute in our matching referee outfits? Oh, and notice the chex mix? That’s HOMEMADE chex mix, thank-you-very-much!! It was tasty, too!

Oh, and you can’t have a Super Bowl party without dessert…..

Oooh, I caught someone snatching a cookie! It looks like one little person’s hand and 2 big people’s hands! I can’t blame them, they were GOOOOOD!!!

Those were the best doggone chocolate chip cookies I’ve ever made/tasted. And do you want to know the secret?? Dry vanilla pudding mix!! It doesn’t even have to be instant pudding mix, either. Oh my! I had no clue such a simple ingredient would make such amazing cookies! You need to give it a whirl the next time you make your own chocolate chip cookies!

Unfortunately, the indulgence does come with consequences…..

Thanks to all those sweets, I found myself right back in the dentist’s chair on Tuesday for some more fillings and drillings… (told you there were a lot! I had just taken a “break” from my last visit.)

I look like I’m being tortured here, but not to worry….I am in GREAT hands when I’m in Dr. Woodward’s chair! He sure knows how to numb a lady! Once again, I didn’t feel a thing! He’s a genius!

(It looks like I was a tad sloppy with my liquid eye liner that day….hmmm, I’ll have to do a better job….and Oh my, it looks like my foundation may be the wrong color! I’m a hot mess, y’all! At least my nose looks clean. I’d hate to have boogies on top of everything else!)

While waiting for the numbing meds to kick in, I got to catch up on the Kardashians!

Like I told you before, they try their best to meet ALL my needs at my dentist’s office….even my entertainment needs! They are SO accommodating it’s ridiculous!

Then, when they want to educate me on where I’m missing with my floss, they change the “source” and MY TEETH….the inside of my very own mouth appears on that TV screen! Pretty cool! SO cutting edge

Oh, and I almost forgot to tell you the most exciting part…..

No respectable Super Bowl party is complete without some good ol fashioned gambling….here’s our square sheet before everyone started picking their spots…

My friend Laurie and her husband Mike won at the end of the first quarter, no one won at the end of the second or third quarter, but GUESS WHO won at the end of the game????

STACY!!!

She won the whole pot! It was a whoppin’ fourteen dollars I think, but that’s better than nothin’ at all! Her winnings paid for some of her gas to get back to East Tennessee.
It was so nice to have her here and SO sad to have to say goodbye. Luckily we will be back up north(east) in about 2 weeks and we will get to see her again soon!

Until then, Stooks…..mmmmmmuuuahhhh! BIG air/cyber smoochies!

A Friend Is A Gift You Give Yourself

Britton_Riley — Thu, 31 Jan 2013 12:10:36 +0000

Guess who is coming for a visit?

The fabulous S! YES, she once again has full fabulous status and I am SO excited to see her. She will be here tomorrow and she will stay the weekend with us!

Stacy was here when I took my very last drink. Stacy was also my maid of honor in my wedding. We have lots and lots of great memories. She was there for me when I had my wreck.

I keep thinking about having my mister take us to St. Augustine on Saturday to spend the day, but I’m not sure she will want to be in the car after driving 8 hours to get to south Georgia. We’ll see!

Sunday we will be hosting a Super Bowl party and I am super excited about that too. I am planning a chili bar and a hot chocolate bar! WOW, I’ve gone from jello shots and hunch punch to chili bars and hot chocolate bars…..I’ve come a LONG way! It will be just as enjoyable as the good old days, perhaps more! No headaches, just lots of gas….those chili beans you know….. I’ll take gas over headaches an puking any ol’ day! Not to mention, after all that hunch punch and jello shots, you could never quite trust a farty….I mean really, you never know if you’ll get more than you bargained for! (And then have a mess in your pants and have to toss your panties….yes, spoken from experience unfortunately)

As I am planning my Super Bowl party, I am thinking I can still use my festive koozie…..

Yup, my referee koozie comes equipped with it’s very own whistle! Isn’t that awesome?

I’ll be stocking my beverage bin with beer for those who choose adult beverages (AND have a driver) and bottles of Root Beer for those of us who can’t handle our alcohol *that would be me*. Everyone will be so enamored with my koozie that no one will even notice that dark brown bottle is just root beer!

Oh, I am so excited I can hardly stand it!

Tonight after work I will be going to have a massage, which my mister bought me for my birthday.

Then when I’m good and relaxed, I’ll get my groceries for the party and come home to prepare for my best friend’s arrival from Knoxville.

The 3 of us will once again be reunited and I can’t wait!

Stacy loves this picture of us. She just adores the range of emotion and chaos going on! I was fussing at my mister for doing “the famous point”….see his hand, pointing at me??? I think I wanted a ‘Nice’ picture, not one of ‘THOSE” pictures…..

So we took this one and I was happy…..after all, you know what they say…Happy Wife, Happy Life!

I can’t wait to tell you all about my weekend!!! It’s going to be EPIC!

How I Got Here

Britton_Riley — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 12:08:51 +0000

We’ve celebrated my milestone of one year sober but do you really know how I got here?

It wasn’t my intention for my last drink to be my LAST DRINK….EVER. It just sort of turned out that way, thanks to Scram. I know the Scram Bracelet is not without it’s occasional problems, just like any manmade creation, but I have nothing but praise for the device. (NO one is paying me to say this, so let’s just get that clear) The thought process behind this type of punishment is simply genius in my mind. WHY couldn’t I have come up with this?? Oooohhh yeah, because I was too busy being DRUNK! I miss alcohol very much (if you couldn’t tell by some of my recent posts) but because of Scram and forced sobriety, I was able to identify that alcohol and I are a match made in hell. It’s just not good for me and I was well on my way to ruin. It’s a miracle I never killed anyone on my many drives to the bar after pre-gaming or home from the bar after living it up, or back from the river after “relaxing” with friends, dogs, beer, and Parliament Lights (gotta LOVE that recessed filter, right? By the way, I think now if I were to take a drag off a cigarette, I’d probably puke my guts out!….except if it was accompanied by a few beers of course). The level of thoughtlessness and selfishness is something I never would have fully understood without that 6 months that I was forced to cut off all alcohol contact with alcohol. I mean sure, when I would wake up in the morning to the disaster known as hurricane drunk Britton, I would say to myself “damn, how did I manage to make it home in one piece??” and that would be a chilling feeling. But that chill would fade and the next time I would find myself in the midst of partying like a rockstar, I would not hesitate to get in the car and go where I needed to go. IGNORANT, I know.

In the days leading up to this forced sobriety, I planned my last few drinking events very carefully. I had my exit strategy down. I knew I would be entering “the Scram zone” on January 24, 2012 (one year ago!!) so I wanted to give my system ample time to “detox” before the big day. My birthday is on the 14th and fell on a Saturday last year so I started my “detox”/ “Scram-prep” after the weekend was over. SO, that is how my official sober date came to be January 16, 2012.

A Giant Milestone

Britton_Riley — Mon, 21 Jan 2013 01:23:41 +0000

I have been neglecting my blog recently and I am sorry. I hope you are still with me!

I had a birthday this week, but perhaps even more special, I had a REAL BIRTHDAY this week! I am ONE YEAR SOBER! That means, if I had been attending AA Meetings, I would have gotten one of these……
Well, I haven’t attended AA Meetings, other than a few online ones, but I have been sober for ONE year and I totally deserve one of these little coins! So I’ve officially given myself one….even if it is just a picture of one that I found on Google Images! That’s official enough for me!

It hasn’t been easy, but I made it! I still struggle though. I struggle a lot.

I have chosen to go through this entire journey publicly. Sometimes I like to think that this is just my own personal journal and that no one will read it. This will be one of those posts that I would prefer to think that no one will read but me, but if it helps just one person struggling with sobriety or one spouse who is dealing with an addict……well….. then it was worth airing my deep dark, very personal thoughts.

I have made it my mission to be 100% honest in this blog, otherwise what would really be the point…. so here is my latest internal and external battle with my old pal alcohol……

I nearly didn’t make it to my one year milestone. We went to Savannah last weekend for my birthday and boy is that a tough place to go as a newbie in sobriety. There is NO driving necessary, bars galore, and TRAVELING beer! Yes, you can go into any bar you choose and say, “I’d like a *insert adult beverage of choice here* TO GO, please”…….Seriously? This is an alcoholic’s dream come true and a recently sober gal’s biggest nightmare!

Why not just put the glass to my lips and tell me I can’t sip!

Here is my mister enjoying a “traveler” outside Boars Head Grill & Tavern down on the river Saturday.

We arrived at our hotel around 9:30 that Friday night and once we were all checked in, we headed out to investigate the night life. Boy was that a mistake. I don’t remember the last time I felt more socially awkward. EVERYONE was drinking…..everyone but me. I just couldn’t loosen up. I wasn’t in my element and I was so uncomfortable. We walked around town, arguing about where to go. I felt out of place everywhere we went. I felt under dressed in my cardigan, jeans, and flip flops. I felt so boring. We made our way to Savannah Smiles Piano Bar. It was SO crowded and everyone seemed to be having a great time singing and laughing. I felt like I had a sour puss look on my face the whole time. I hated myself. I was a boring wife. Seeing that I was in a state of internal turmoil, my mister said “Honey, if you were drinking right now, you’d be doing x,y, & z….”

(x, y, & z are realistic embarrassing things I would have been doing….like dancing on the bar, making “friends” with random strangers, and puking in trash cans within plain sight….among many other things) Thank goodness for my mister and his dose of reality when I really needed it!

Now I can say I was having a pity party. I was taking it out on my mister. I couldn’t focus on anything except what I COULDN’T do. I was too preoccupied with doing this whole self pity crap to enjoy my time with my mister. I was punishing us both. Why? It was so unnecessary. BUT I can’t control my feelings. It’s just how I felt. I was full of anger at myself.

Saturday we went on The Old Savanah Trolley Tour to see the historic sights of this magnificent old city.

(Look Ma, No Hagover!!)

We saw the 300 year old tree, which was SO cool!

We went to the Cathedral of St. John the Baptist.

I even tried to go into the confessional, but it was locked…..it was still cool though, just like on TV!

There were 14 trolley stops and we got off to explore and for my mister to grab a nice cold adult beverage at several of them.

Here is my mister swinging like a monkey from a tree at a trolley stop, waiting to be picked up. We had gotten off because we saw a day spa and wanted to try to get pedicures. They were booked. Boo!

All of this walking, riding, and watching everyone drink beer everywhere we went was really starting to take a toll on me.

I was ready to throw in the towel. I told my mister it would be our little secret, no one would have to know. We went to the “Olde Pink House”, planted ourselves at the bar, and I perused the wine list. My mister ordered his beer and I had my choice narrowed down to two. It was either going to be their rosé or their reisling, but first I would need to know if the only reisling on the menu was on the dry side, the sweet side, or middle of the road since it was an unfamiliar one to me. My mister said to go ahead. He says he was attempting reverse psychology, but after I closed the menu, ready to place my order, he began chiding me; as he knew what a huge mistake I was preparing to make. The bar tender kept asking if I’d made a decision. After my mister’s guilt trip, I just couldn’t ask the question. The bar tender asked if there was something that I was looking for that I didn’t see on the menu. She was clearly confused by my seemingly erratic bar behavior. Yep, that was a close one.

I didn’t order a glass of my beloved calming serum. I didn’t order anything at all. My mister sucked down his beer, and we left the bar. I sulked….and sulked…..and sulked. My attitude was in the dumpster. I felt like a boring wife. All I could think of was how much fun we would be having if I were drinking. We’d be stopping for a drink at every trolley stop on the route! We’d be meeting people, we’d be laughing and making memories! We’d be having a blast! But NO, I am not the fun person my mister married. I am a boring, bitter teatotaller. Bitter because I am a teatotaller. Because I can’t handle my alcohol. What is WRONG with me? WHY can’t I just be NORMAL, WHY can’t I have a drink with my husband? Why am I missing out on these romantic moments of having a glass of wine with my husband in a quaint little bar in historic Savannah? The weather was beautiful, the french doors were wide open, it was the most perfect setting…..and I missed out.

(Am I having a private pity party here?)

We made our way back to City Market. My attitude was still in crap-ville. We decided to wait for our friends at an upstairs bar called “Tree House“, where we could watch the action in the square from a bird’s eye view. We could see the horse and carriages come and go, which was especially fun to observe. The bar tender at the Tree House was SUPER nice. Of course we forgot our phone chargers at home, and the bar tender charged our phones for us! My mister ordered his beer (it was HAPPY HOUR and it was only $2!). The bar tender’s attitude was so bright and cheery, it lifted my mood a bit. I asked him to make me something fruity and special and non alcoholic. Instead of looking at me like I was from Mars, he happily asked if I wanted something with caffeine! He mixed up some red bull with fruity juices and it was delicious. I asked him what he calls that drink. He said he just made it up and it didn’t have a name. He asked me my name and I told him my usual….”Britton, like the country” (I have to do that or people will say “BRITTANY?”) He brightly told me that drink is called The Great Britton! Then I had about 10 of them ….and I don’t think he charged me for more than one! That definitely pulled me out of my self pity, thank goodness!

That evening we went to dinner at The Pirates House before going on the ghost tour we had booked. My mister had been steadily drinking all day. Remember, that’s A-OKAY with me, in fact I unhealthily encourage it. For some reason I feel like I am getting my own cravings met by watching him drink. Isn’t that sick? Am I the only one with an alcohol problem who does this? Please, PLEASE someone tell me I’m not alone in this.

I don’t understand why I do it. I encourage his drinking and then get upset and irritated with him when he’s had too much. That makes zero sense. The waitress thought he was charming and the people on our ghost tour found him quite entertaining. He was the life of the party!

See that “point”? THAT’s his famous “point”, when you KNOW he’s feeling good….look here….

The famous point!

As the tour went on, the less and less amused I became. My mister was the first to volunteer for interactive demonstrations, got the hiccups, and eventually wandered off to find a place to go to the bathroom…..NOT in a designated urine receptacle. He was jovial and funny and frankly he was wearing me out. I was once again NOT a happy camper.

(This was our tour guide/chauffeur on the ghost tour ….. she was a really crazy driver but had a great sense of humor!)

See how UN-amused I was by my mister’s antics??

I couldn’t wait to get back to the hotel. When we did, my mister was hungry and we went for a late night pizza…..

…..even LESS amused at this point….

See that face? I’m giving him the stink eye….I learned that from Sir Higgins.

In the morning, my mister had his green Mr. Yuk face on.

He puked several times throughout the drive back that morning, rode home in the 3rd row seat in the fetal position, and spent the day in bed when we got home….and uttered those famous last words….”I”ll never drink again!”

ONE thing is for sure, that was Karma I was experiencing!

I completely earned that from all the times I’ve done it to him….especially the time I got sick in the car, tried to puke out the window as we were driving down the interstate, and instead it ended up splattered ALL OVER the headliner ….from the front of the car, all the way to the back window. EW!!!

Yes, needless to say, we are all very glad I don’t drink anymore. Seeing how sick he got made me so happy I hadn’t succumbed.

I WILL find my comfort zone. I don’t know when, but I will.

My mister and I continue to make adjustments to this new life, sans alcohol – for me. I know it will take some time and many more adjustments, but I have faith that we will get it right eventually. We will keep working at it and we will find OUR comfort zone.